First-name Basis Now, Senator McConnell?

Dear McConnell:

I've noticed in your television commercials that the stupid female doctor with the diabetic son and absolutely no idea what the ACA means, and your black female friend
(Three birds with one stone? Way to go Team Mitch.) whose husband obviously didn't have a right to take his son to his home country both call you Mitch. Never, in my wildest nightmares, did I think that when you make your last minute photo-op tour, hoping we'll be fooled into thinking maybe you do care a teeny tiny bit about Kentucky and the people in it, you would welcome us to call you by your first name. Yet, not only are you standing in front of placards that contain the word friend (nice use of subliminal staging although a bit too overt and over-the-top to be anything more than silly and desperate), people who would generally be more respectful are calling you Mitch.

Does that mean the two women who made the ads for your campaign are close, personal friends of yours? If so, that would make most people decide that they aren't exactly objective, or that they might say whatever you want them to say for political reasons. Or, are you trying to give the appearance of being an approachable guy?

Not going to happen.

Ever.

If you look back over this collection of correspondence and the many comments I leave on your Facebook page (at your urging, which is also verified on this blog) you'll see that, even though I have no respect for you, I usually address you as Senator McConnell, out of respect for the office you hold. I have, at times, called you Ofkock and Ofturdblossom, hoping it would prompt people to give The Handmaid's Tale a second look. I cringe every time I see people call you turtle or Miss McConnell because I wish people would stick to your actions instead of your appearance or sexual orientation.

These Mitch ads sorta made my head spin. I considered addressing this to Dear Mitch but remembered the many times that you and your allies, hand-puppets, and assorted uneducated fans refer to our President by his last name only and decided to go with Dear McConnell. On second thought, I deleted the dear.

Knauer